Lint: Hello Mr Brand New Argos Catalogue. Wow, you are all green and thicker than ever. I bet you've now got voice recognition hardware in you so I can just say what I want and you'll open to the correct page.
Argos Catalogue: [silence]
Lint: Aw, you're shy. I'll try anyway: Camcorders.
Argos Catalogue: [silence]
Lint: Hmmm, clearly out of camcorders. How about: Diamond Rings.
Argos Catalogue: [silence]
Lint: Maybe I need the special jewellery add-on to get that to work… Ok – an easy one for you: Elephants.
Argos Catalogue: [slightly sulky silence]
Lint: Sorry, I was being silly there. Of course you can’t buy elephants at Argos. I have to go to Index for elephants. Ok Mr Catalogue – last chance: Sofas.
Argos Catalogue: [silence]
Lint: You are a bad catalogue – or potentially just bad technology inserted into a perfectly good old-fashioned paper catalogue. I shall return you henceforth to the store from which thou came.
Argos Catalogue: Oh shut up and leave me alone you stupid lunatic.
Lint: Ooooooh, you bitch.
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