I may be off my dot

This is the earliest I've been up on a Saturday morning for a looooong time - I left the bed at 7am. The outside world isn't hugely tempting me into it, since there appears to be some rather heavy wind, and possibly rain too.

I might have a... coffee!

Yes, that is now an option that I can take. As I've said before, I stopped the old coffee for the duration of 2004, and had my first cup in over a year on the 2nd this year. Since then, I've had a few cups, but nowhere near as many as I would have done before my break. When it comes down to it, I prefer the taste of tea (and fruit tea).

Drinking coffee seems to give me more of a buzz than it used to. I think I used to drink so much that I just became immune to the effects. I was always seeking that stronger high. First filter coffee. Then I'd move onto Espressos. Then Double Espressos. Then pure beans. Then heroin and cocaine (in a mix with water, no milk or sugar).

Now, having kicked the habit, I think I can manage things better. Limit my coffee. Savour it. Wish it hadn't given me a headache.

And avoid instant coffee wherever possible, due to its innate rubbishness.

The thing that really surprised me about giving up coffee was how easy it was. One day I drank loads, the next I just... stopped. Just like that. The only times it was particularly (though not hugely) hard was in restaurants after meals when everyone else had coffees or liqueur coffees. Sometimes I'd join in by just having a straight whisky. Actually, I think I may have had the better deal there.

The disappointing thing was that I never at any time felt actually better for not drinking coffee. I didn't start to sleep better and there were no other noticeable good effects. Except now I notice bad effects when I do drink it. Darn.

I'm glad I have started again though, because I was fed up of having to explain to people why I wasn't drinking coffee. When you do something for no good reason, other than to see if you can, people can look at you funny.