Sponsor this!

I don't know whether it's something in the weather or something else but in recent weeks everybody at work seems to have started running, cycling, triathaling or anything else they can claim is hard work but that they actually quite enjoy, all in the name of charity. Which inevitably means sponsorship. I can't remember a time when I've seen so many sponsorship forms in so few weeks. I started off being quite generous but as the sponsor forms kept comming I have been trailing off a bit and am now down to £5 a pop. Which has already cost me £15 future pounds this week and it's only Tuesday. I've lost count of how much I owe from past weeks.

By the end of this week I expect I'll only be able to afford around 20p sponsorship for someone who is willing to run all the way to the moon and back. And that would be a pretty big achievement, even for someone who's a pretty decent runner, like what I am.

Maybe it's my fault. Maybe I just know too many people, or maybe I just need to learn to say No. But can't people just sit around on their arses at home for a bit and leave me out of it? Please?

NO!

(oh, that was easy)

NO! NO! NO!

NOOOOOOOOOO!

Only one thing for it - I think I'll start a aponsored sponsoring with all proceeds going to pay off my sponsoring debts. I'll get people to sponsor me for the number of times that I have to sponsor people or perhaps for the number of future pounds that I sponsor them for. If I get enough people to promise me money I'll be able to use it to pay the sponsor money that I owe to the stupid charities and use my own money to do nice things like buy chcocolate and beer and girls.

NNNNNNOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!

Thinking about it, this is a pretty good idea! Sponsor me in the comments if you like. I accept hard cash, personal cheques, electronic bank transfer, Paypal or beer. If you also leave your name and address and you're also a UK taxpayer then I may be able to get Gift Aid from the UK government. And remember, your money will be going to charity because I'll be using it to pay sponsorship money that I do or will owe, so you'll be able to feel good about yourself too, lucky you.

And remember, every pound, dollar or rupee that you pledge will help me to help others. Think of the children, the cancer sufferers, the lepers and the righteous Campaign To Bring Back Busted. You can help them. You can help them all today.