We all know that glue is made from horses. So in the same way that you can take some oranges and make orange juice because oranges are orangey, there must be something inherently gluey about horses. But what is that glueiness? Why do we use horses to make glue, but not cows? And how come if you boil a horse you get glue whilst if you boil a pig you get boiled ham?
It all seems a bit wrong to me. Though probably not as wrong as it appears to the horses. Poor little blighters. One minute they're galloping through fields thinking happy horse thoughts and the next minute they're a prit-stick. I don't even like horses much, but it does seem unfair.
I wonder what made early man first convert all his horses into glue? Perhaps it was just boredom. Or maybe he was hungry and wanted to make cooked horse and when inserting said cooked horse into his mouth he found that his jaws became inexplicably stuck together and he put two and two together? Not a mistake that one would make over and over I expect.
It's actually quite lucky that horses aren't overly sticky in their natural pre-cooked state. Horse racing would never have evolved into its current form - the horses would just stick to the floor. I suppose as a plus point it would be much harder for the little jockies to fall off.
Now I'm wondering whether you can get high by sniffing horses?
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There's a university horse farm across from my workplace, and we DO occasionally get high off the horse fumes. It's not the usual kind of munchies-trails-giggling kind of high, but more the fock!-I-can't-breathe-through-the-manure sort of high.
Of course you can get high sniffing horse. My cousin went on holiday last September, and he's got into it with some of the friends he met there.
(With apologies to Mr Nelson.)
I don't think I'll investigate the horse sniffing any further if that's alright...
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