My current toilet roll has small pictures of puppies on. This is apparently some form of innovation. Andrex, in their infinite wisdom, have decided that what users of toilet roll really need are small embossed dogs. Several per sheet. "Puppies on a roll".
What is the point in this? Does having a puppy there make the paper softer, more comfortable, more absorbent? No, of course it doesn't. I just don't see who, in their right mind, would find the whole bum-wiping experience improved by the presence of puppies up their arse-crack.
It's madness, and a product that just isn't needed. If I wanted to clean my bottom with pictures of dogs, I'd pop down to York central library, head to the "D" section, find the first dog book they had (something like "The Observer's Book Of Dogs"), check it out, take it home and wipe to my heart's content. Because that's what any normal person would do.
Obviously I'd wipe the book down with (puppy-less) toilet paper before returning it to the library. I'm not a caveman.
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