Misdirection

My parents came up to visit today and I took my mother shopping in town. The way I take my mother shopping is that she tells me a shop she wants to go to, I take her to it and wait outside and she goes in and does whatever it is that mothers do in shops. It seems to take a long time.

Today I was waiting outside Duttons for Buttons. A young couple came up to me and asked if I could point them in the right direction for the Jorvik centre. I could indeed do this - they just had to go back the way they'd come about twenty metres and then turn left down a pedestrian street. They'd have been there in about a minute.

Unfortunately for them, I appeared to have a brief mental seizure and forgot where I was standing. I thought I was up the other end of the street I was on. I pointed them in what I thought was the right direction, but sadly my instructions will have taken them to a completely wrong place. I'm wondering how far down Walmgate they will have gotten before realising they had been misled.

The funny thing was that as they walked off (in the wrong direction), I overheard the girl saying to the boy "see, I told you it was down here". For a short while the boy will have felt useless. But soon they would both have felt useless, perhaps thinking that they had been too stupid to follow the simple directions that that nice man had given them.

Maybe they'll have had an argument about it, ended their relationship there and then on the spot (outside Macdonalds the furniture shop, not to be confused with the other one) and then both comitted suicide by tossing themselves into the septic waters of the River Foss. Maybe.

Ah well, I'd like to say sorry to both of them that their sad pathetic lives had to end that way.