She loves me!

Today I received an email from a very pretty girl who I must have met at some point in the past. Even though it is quite a personal message, I hope she won't mind be quoting it in full here:

"Do not iagnore me pleaase, I found your email somewhere and now decided to write you. I am coming to your place in few weeks and thought we can meet each other. Let me know if you do not mind. I am a nice pretty girl. Donb't reply to this email. Emaaila me direclty at makym@snail4mail.com"

What an offer! But I have some reservations about her kind words:

1. Her spelling is quite atrocious. However, I assume this is because she is from Eastern Europe. And bad spelling can be cute sometimes so I haven't been put off yet.

2. She's coming to my place! Wow, I guess we will be meeting up then. I'm so excited. I just wish I remembered her...

3. "I am a nice pretty girl". Good! I wouldn't want you to visit if you were a horrible heffer!

4. Hang on... Why have you sent this to ten other people at the same time? I thought it was me you loved...

So I thought it might be wise to just check her out a little bit before emaailaing her. I went to her domain, www.snail4mail.com and there was a picture of her there, and she is quite pretty as she said she was. But... there's some oaf fondling her. The bitch has a boyfriend already and has been getting my hopes up just for kicks. Gaaaaahhhhh! I'm gutted.

And to make it worse, the whole bad spelling thing was just an act as she is clearly a highly intelligent chemist who can make all kinds of drugs (though she seems to specialise in penile disfunction). The whole bad spelling thing was just a lark to lure in gullible men like me! And possibly gullible women too for all I know.

I'm glad I didn't email her. I still don't remember giving her my address though... Guess I was probably drunk.